#1 - 2017 in Movies
Over the past eight months, I've had a stark realization: post-college life is really boring. So, as a part of my quarter-life crisis, I started a blog. Do people still read blogs? I have no idea. Either way, here we go.
I saw a lot of movies last year! Some were good, some were great, and some were neither of those things. Today, I'm ranking them from worst to best and talking a bit about each. Haven't seen some of them yet? Don't worry - this will be 100% spoiler free guaranteed. Also, this is all totally subjective and I'm just some guy. But ALSO keep in mind that I have very good opinions.
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets
Valerian feels like a George Lucas fever dream. I had high hopes for it - I love a weird and wacky sci-fi. This was both weird and wacky, but not in the right way. The two leads have a very 70s, thinly-veiled-sexism kind of dynamic; he spends the whole movie lusting after her, and even though she knows he's a creep, she loves him anyways. Gross. There are a few creative set pieces with lasers and spacesuits and whatnot, but none of it is as memorable as it thinks it is. I guess Rihanna's character is alright.
Rough Night
It's about time we had more broad comedies with women-led casts. I was pretty excited to see everyone in this movie, but particularly Scarlett Johansson - she's really funny, and doesn't get many chances to be in her other films. The other four leads are welcome additions as well, but... it's just not that funny. Most of the jokes bring the story to a screeching halt, only to land with a pretty resounding thud. Obviously, I don't think I was the target audience here, but it really didn't do it for me. Any way we could get this cast back with a better script?
Kong: Skull Island
Valerian feels like a George Lucas fever dream. I had high hopes for it - I love a weird and wacky sci-fi. This was both weird and wacky, but not in the right way. The two leads have a very 70s, thinly-veiled-sexism kind of dynamic; he spends the whole movie lusting after her, and even though she knows he's a creep, she loves him anyways. Gross. There are a few creative set pieces with lasers and spacesuits and whatnot, but none of it is as memorable as it thinks it is. I guess Rihanna's character is alright.
Rough Night
It's about time we had more broad comedies with women-led casts. I was pretty excited to see everyone in this movie, but particularly Scarlett Johansson - she's really funny, and doesn't get many chances to be in her other films. The other four leads are welcome additions as well, but... it's just not that funny. Most of the jokes bring the story to a screeching halt, only to land with a pretty resounding thud. Obviously, I don't think I was the target audience here, but it really didn't do it for me. Any way we could get this cast back with a better script?
Kong: Skull Island
Ok, this might sound a lot like what I said about the last one. I really like this cast. John C. Reilly is especially great in this, weirdly enough. Brie Larson is really good too, but that's less weird - she's always great. This movie also just looks beautiful. The cinematography is kind of brilliant, and CGI Kong has never looked better (or bigger). But the dialogue feels so stunted. Tom Hiddleston's character speaks solely in one-liners, and that's just one example. But look, if this pays for the movie where King Kong and Godzilla fight each other and then become friends, I'm all for it.
Power Rangers
The picture above almost says more about this movie than I can: this ain't your grandaddy's Power Rangers. Each of these super-powered high schoolers are fully-formed characters, dealing with actual issues: anxiety, depression, trust, family, acceptance, and so on. The first two acts of Power Rangers feels more like Breakfast Club, and it's a pretty genuine delight. The villain is no good, and the third act just falls apart, but this movie's pretty solid. If you've got an angsty teen in your life, or if you're the angsty teen in your life, give this one a go. And for any Breaking Bad fans: Bryan Cranston plays a big blue face in a wall. You're welcome.
Wonder Woman
Wonder Woman was an absolute breath of fresh air, for a number of reasons. One: the DCEU had only made bad/dumb movies before this one (and after it!). Two: this is the first female-led superhero film I've seen that doesn't actually hurt to watch. Have you seen Catwoman? It's so bad! Wonder Woman is entertaining through and through, and gets everything right about that character. She's strong and inspiring and beautiful and everything else that has made her an icon for almost 80 years. A few folks have criticized it for being cheesy - and I'm inclined to agree - but maybe that's ok. To quote director Patty Jenkins, "I'm tired of sincerity being something we have to be afraid of doing. I wanted to tell a story about a hero who believes in love, who is filled with love, who believes in change and the betterment of mankind. Art is supposed to bring beauty to the world." Hard to argue with that.
Kingsman: The Golden Circle
I'll probably regret putting this movie this high on the list. I really love the first Kingsman, but Golden Circle is really only mediocre. The villain is paper-thin, the motivations don't make sense, great actors are severely underutilized (Jeff Bridges AND Channing Tatum!). The creativity and freshness of the first film is almost completely lost. And yet... I really enjoyed it. As soon as a stopped to think about it, I thought "well, this isn't very good," but I still had a great time. Maybe that says more about me than about the movie. Either way, Elton John's great in this.
The Big Sick
Of all the movies I'm writing about, this is the one I heard the most about before seeing it. I'd only heard good things, so my expectations were high. And... it's fine. It straddles the line between rom-com and straight comedy pretty well, in that one second you're laughing and the next you're about to cry. The acting is pretty superb, but overall, it's not too memorable. Let's say it's a good date movie. Writer and lead actor Kumail Nanjiani (playing himself) recently tweeted that the entire film is available to watch for free on Pornhub.com. What a world.
Logan Lucky
Logan Lucky made next to no money, which is a shame; it's pretty good. Picture a traditional heist movie, but in rural Kentucky. The cast is great all around, but especially Daniel Craig and Adam Driver. There are a few moments in the story that hinge on chance a bit too much for my liking, but I can't really get into that without getting spoilery. Look, if you like any of these actors, give it a go. It sure is fun to hear James Bond with a southern accent.
Spider-Man: Homecoming
They've finally figured out Spider-Man. No more Macquire Moping, no more Garfield Garbage, just good old Happy Holland. Homecoming perfectly reintroduces Peter Parker and fits him snugly right into the rest of the MCU. Tonally, this movie might be the most faithful comic book adaptation I've ever seen. It's just fun. To top it all off, Michael Keaton's Vulture is the most compelling villain from Marvel to date.
The Lego Batman Movie
It's weird enough that we got a Lego movie. But now a Lego... Batman... Movie? All corporate branding aside, this one's a blast. It's a goofy and zany and heartfelt in all the best ways. I'd show this movie to a kid just as quickly as I'd show it to my parents (maybe). To make matters weirder, TLBM seems to understand the Batman as a character better than the live-action DC movies. Go figure.
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2
Speaking of weird: the movie about a talking raccoon with a tree friend got a sequel. And it's great. It's not quite as fun as the first Guardians, but it's way more thought-provoking. The stakes are way higher. We learn more about each of the characters while they're learning about themselves. Not all of the emotional moments land, and neither do all of the jokes - but for the most part, they do. This movie is inventive and creative in exactly the way that Valerian isn't. Not to point fingers or anything.
Dunkirk
Man, this one is tense. Throughout this movie, there's the sound of a ticking clock. You hardly notice it, but it keeps you on the edge of your seat the entire 106 minutes. The story is a short one, but told from multiple perspectives. It does suffer from the same thing as many of Christopher Nolan's movies, in that I don't give a damn about most of the characters. But the tension and emotion and anxiety you'll feel absolutely makes up for it.
Thor: Ragnarok
Wild. Taika Waititi seems to only make bizarre and hilarious movies. So give him a budget of $180 million and a stale franchise, and this is what you get. For the first time in any Marvel movie, Thor is actually likable and entertaining. Chris Hemsworth is really funny, something we hadn't really seen before (except maybe in Ghostbusters - I haven't seen it). The new additions are great, too; Jeff Goldblum is full-on 110% Goldbulm, and Tessa Thompson is quickly becoming one of my favorite actors. Ragnarok never goes where you expect it to, right up until the end. Strap in.
Star Wars: The Last Jedi
THIS MOVIE RUINED LUKE SKYWALKER AND I'M A BIG CRYBABY AND I WANT MY JAR JAR BINKS. Shut up, nerds. Last Jedi absolutely delivers, and in none of the ways you expect it to. Star Wars has never had more conflicted and relatable characters before. This is much to the credit of writer/director Rian Johnson, who has pumped new life into a franchise that didn't really need new life pumped into it. It fleshes out the universe in unexpected ways, yet stays true to Star Wars' core values. The whole cast is fantastic, but Mark Hamill stands out the most. This is the best he's ever been in anything, ever. How's that for a big call?
Logan
I don't care who you are - this movie will make you cry. Probably. Director James Mangold has said that he didn't want an R rating for Logan just for violence and f-bombs (there's plenty of both), but so he could make a more mature film. Longer scenes, less obvious symbolism, more questionable characters. This movie will make you fall in love, then punch you in the gut and kick you while you're down. It's all beautifully done, in a way that couldn't have been expected from an X-Men movie. Patrick Stewart is a shoe-in for a Best Supporting Actor nod. And that's the thing: if you strip away all the super powers and robot limbs, Logan is classic Oscar bait. So bizarre this is in the same series as... well, most of the X-Men movies.
Before I get to my #1 pick, I wanted to rattle off a few movies I wanted to see last year, but never got to. If you scroll down, you'll probably just see my #1 anyways, but really try to just ignore it until you've read to that point. For me? Please?
Get Out - Just never got around to it. I only heard good things. I have no excuse. Forgive me.
Justice League - I almost saw it, but none of my friends wanted to, so I said screw it. I heard it's bad.
Lady Bird - I couldn't find a theater in was playing in!
Blade Runner 2049 - Haven't seen the first one. Next!
The Shape of Water - Yeah.
The Disaster Artist - Never saw The Room. I'll get to it, relax.
Coco - Aside from the opening short, I heard it's fantastic.
Beauty and the Beast - Whatever, man.
Ok. I assume the anticipation is just killing you.
Baby Driver
If you can ignore Kevin Spacey - and I urge you to - this might be a perfect movie. Baby Driver takes everything you've seen in action movies, rom-coms, and arthouse films, flips it all on its head and tosses it all together. Each character is developed and charismatic enough to have their own movie. The soundtrack alone is a work of art, flipping between genres and styles to best fit each scene. Watch this movie two, three, four times and I guarantee you'll get something new each time. Edgar Wright's outdone himself - and that's saying something.
That's it - those are all the movies I saw in 2017. Aw, wow, geez, what will 2018 bring? Perhaps I'll see some more movies. Thinking about the future sure is crazy, right guys?
Anyways, thanks for reading! Please let me know what you think, even if you hated this. See ya next time.
- Drew
Power Rangers
The picture above almost says more about this movie than I can: this ain't your grandaddy's Power Rangers. Each of these super-powered high schoolers are fully-formed characters, dealing with actual issues: anxiety, depression, trust, family, acceptance, and so on. The first two acts of Power Rangers feels more like Breakfast Club, and it's a pretty genuine delight. The villain is no good, and the third act just falls apart, but this movie's pretty solid. If you've got an angsty teen in your life, or if you're the angsty teen in your life, give this one a go. And for any Breaking Bad fans: Bryan Cranston plays a big blue face in a wall. You're welcome.
Wonder Woman
Wonder Woman was an absolute breath of fresh air, for a number of reasons. One: the DCEU had only made bad/dumb movies before this one (and after it!). Two: this is the first female-led superhero film I've seen that doesn't actually hurt to watch. Have you seen Catwoman? It's so bad! Wonder Woman is entertaining through and through, and gets everything right about that character. She's strong and inspiring and beautiful and everything else that has made her an icon for almost 80 years. A few folks have criticized it for being cheesy - and I'm inclined to agree - but maybe that's ok. To quote director Patty Jenkins, "I'm tired of sincerity being something we have to be afraid of doing. I wanted to tell a story about a hero who believes in love, who is filled with love, who believes in change and the betterment of mankind. Art is supposed to bring beauty to the world." Hard to argue with that.
Kingsman: The Golden Circle
I'll probably regret putting this movie this high on the list. I really love the first Kingsman, but Golden Circle is really only mediocre. The villain is paper-thin, the motivations don't make sense, great actors are severely underutilized (Jeff Bridges AND Channing Tatum!). The creativity and freshness of the first film is almost completely lost. And yet... I really enjoyed it. As soon as a stopped to think about it, I thought "well, this isn't very good," but I still had a great time. Maybe that says more about me than about the movie. Either way, Elton John's great in this.
The Big Sick
Of all the movies I'm writing about, this is the one I heard the most about before seeing it. I'd only heard good things, so my expectations were high. And... it's fine. It straddles the line between rom-com and straight comedy pretty well, in that one second you're laughing and the next you're about to cry. The acting is pretty superb, but overall, it's not too memorable. Let's say it's a good date movie. Writer and lead actor Kumail Nanjiani (playing himself) recently tweeted that the entire film is available to watch for free on Pornhub.com. What a world.
Logan Lucky
Logan Lucky made next to no money, which is a shame; it's pretty good. Picture a traditional heist movie, but in rural Kentucky. The cast is great all around, but especially Daniel Craig and Adam Driver. There are a few moments in the story that hinge on chance a bit too much for my liking, but I can't really get into that without getting spoilery. Look, if you like any of these actors, give it a go. It sure is fun to hear James Bond with a southern accent.
Spider-Man: Homecoming
They've finally figured out Spider-Man. No more Macquire Moping, no more Garfield Garbage, just good old Happy Holland. Homecoming perfectly reintroduces Peter Parker and fits him snugly right into the rest of the MCU. Tonally, this movie might be the most faithful comic book adaptation I've ever seen. It's just fun. To top it all off, Michael Keaton's Vulture is the most compelling villain from Marvel to date.
The Lego Batman Movie
It's weird enough that we got a Lego movie. But now a Lego... Batman... Movie? All corporate branding aside, this one's a blast. It's a goofy and zany and heartfelt in all the best ways. I'd show this movie to a kid just as quickly as I'd show it to my parents (maybe). To make matters weirder, TLBM seems to understand the Batman as a character better than the live-action DC movies. Go figure.
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2
Speaking of weird: the movie about a talking raccoon with a tree friend got a sequel. And it's great. It's not quite as fun as the first Guardians, but it's way more thought-provoking. The stakes are way higher. We learn more about each of the characters while they're learning about themselves. Not all of the emotional moments land, and neither do all of the jokes - but for the most part, they do. This movie is inventive and creative in exactly the way that Valerian isn't. Not to point fingers or anything.
Dunkirk
Man, this one is tense. Throughout this movie, there's the sound of a ticking clock. You hardly notice it, but it keeps you on the edge of your seat the entire 106 minutes. The story is a short one, but told from multiple perspectives. It does suffer from the same thing as many of Christopher Nolan's movies, in that I don't give a damn about most of the characters. But the tension and emotion and anxiety you'll feel absolutely makes up for it.
Thor: Ragnarok
Wild. Taika Waititi seems to only make bizarre and hilarious movies. So give him a budget of $180 million and a stale franchise, and this is what you get. For the first time in any Marvel movie, Thor is actually likable and entertaining. Chris Hemsworth is really funny, something we hadn't really seen before (except maybe in Ghostbusters - I haven't seen it). The new additions are great, too; Jeff Goldblum is full-on 110% Goldbulm, and Tessa Thompson is quickly becoming one of my favorite actors. Ragnarok never goes where you expect it to, right up until the end. Strap in.
Star Wars: The Last Jedi
THIS MOVIE RUINED LUKE SKYWALKER AND I'M A BIG CRYBABY AND I WANT MY JAR JAR BINKS. Shut up, nerds. Last Jedi absolutely delivers, and in none of the ways you expect it to. Star Wars has never had more conflicted and relatable characters before. This is much to the credit of writer/director Rian Johnson, who has pumped new life into a franchise that didn't really need new life pumped into it. It fleshes out the universe in unexpected ways, yet stays true to Star Wars' core values. The whole cast is fantastic, but Mark Hamill stands out the most. This is the best he's ever been in anything, ever. How's that for a big call?
Logan
I don't care who you are - this movie will make you cry. Probably. Director James Mangold has said that he didn't want an R rating for Logan just for violence and f-bombs (there's plenty of both), but so he could make a more mature film. Longer scenes, less obvious symbolism, more questionable characters. This movie will make you fall in love, then punch you in the gut and kick you while you're down. It's all beautifully done, in a way that couldn't have been expected from an X-Men movie. Patrick Stewart is a shoe-in for a Best Supporting Actor nod. And that's the thing: if you strip away all the super powers and robot limbs, Logan is classic Oscar bait. So bizarre this is in the same series as... well, most of the X-Men movies.
Before I get to my #1 pick, I wanted to rattle off a few movies I wanted to see last year, but never got to. If you scroll down, you'll probably just see my #1 anyways, but really try to just ignore it until you've read to that point. For me? Please?
Get Out - Just never got around to it. I only heard good things. I have no excuse. Forgive me.
Justice League - I almost saw it, but none of my friends wanted to, so I said screw it. I heard it's bad.
Lady Bird - I couldn't find a theater in was playing in!
Blade Runner 2049 - Haven't seen the first one. Next!
The Shape of Water - Yeah.
The Disaster Artist - Never saw The Room. I'll get to it, relax.
Coco - Aside from the opening short, I heard it's fantastic.
Beauty and the Beast - Whatever, man.
Ok. I assume the anticipation is just killing you.
Baby Driver
If you can ignore Kevin Spacey - and I urge you to - this might be a perfect movie. Baby Driver takes everything you've seen in action movies, rom-coms, and arthouse films, flips it all on its head and tosses it all together. Each character is developed and charismatic enough to have their own movie. The soundtrack alone is a work of art, flipping between genres and styles to best fit each scene. Watch this movie two, three, four times and I guarantee you'll get something new each time. Edgar Wright's outdone himself - and that's saying something.
That's it - those are all the movies I saw in 2017. Aw, wow, geez, what will 2018 bring? Perhaps I'll see some more movies. Thinking about the future sure is crazy, right guys?
Anyways, thanks for reading! Please let me know what you think, even if you hated this. See ya next time.
- Drew
You absolutely do not have to see the original Blade Runner to see Blade Runner 2049, but you will be confused once Harrison Ford shows up, because it's clear he's supposed to be "important." Blade Runner 2049 was my favorite film of the year. Logan and Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 were tight contenders.
ReplyDeleteThey're on the list! Thanks man!
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